


The Workout Job

by flickerface



Series: The Third Time's The Charm Job [3]
Category: Leverage
Genre: Asexual Character, Asexual Relationship, Multi, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-23
Updated: 2015-03-23
Packaged: 2018-03-19 04:55:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,006
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3597117
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flickerface/pseuds/flickerface
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Hardison is not trying to catch his girlfriend and his boyfriend having sex. No. That is definitely, totally, entirely not what's happening."</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Workout Job

Hardison is not trying to catch his girlfriend and his boyfriend having sex. No. That is definitely, totally, entirely not what's happening.

No.

All right, so this one time he got back earlier than he said he'd be back and he heard Parker snorting with laughter and the low rumble of Eliot's sexy voice... so maybe he crept closer and then he had tripped into the room and it turned out Parker was teaching Eliot how to pick locks. Non-metaphorical, actual, literal locks.

Hardison is polite, so he doesn't bring it up. People do all kinds of things in the afterglow. But Parker and Eliot didn't _look_ like they'd just been having sex.

So okay, he's been paying attention. They take their scheduled date nights and they go to fancy restaurants in Portland, he knows that much, because usually one or the other of them—or both—turn up a couple days earlier asking him to fudge them a reservation. And they take long walks back together and he's pretty sure he's caught them holding hands. But then nothing, and it's been months, and Hardison is starting to feel weird about having had sex with Eliot the first chance he got. He was pretty sure that was normal. Isn't that normal?

So he pays a little more attention. And every time he happens to be walking past they're playing a board game, or he's teaching Parker a grapple hold, or she's rigged him up to hang near the ceiling. At least, Hardison's pretty sure that was what was happening that time, and he's fairly certain that sex wasn't involved.

Not that it matters. Not that he cares that they're having sex. It would just be nice if he knew, 100%, for certain. Hardison likes being certain.

And, okay, he's imagined Parker and Eliot together and it'd be pretty hot.

The last straw is when he hears thuds from down the hallway and edges toward the noise, fascinated and horrified. Is this it? Is this, finally, it?

"Oh, hey, Hardison!" Parker says breathlessly before Hardison thought he was even visible from the room. She's fully dressed and Eliot's wearing some sort of pads that make him look like the Michelin man.

"Are you people," Hardison says furiously, "having sex or aren't you!"

There is a long and awful moment of silence.

Parker bursts out laughing. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry," she says, "oh, your face—"

Eliot strips off his padding. Underneath he's wearing a short-sleeved white shirt, damp through with sweat in patches that make the fabric cling to his torso, and jeans. Hardison is man enough to admit that he's momentarily distracted by it. "Come in, man," he says.

Hardison, finally, thinks to close the door against the hallway that leads to the stairs down to the brewpub. His servers have been gossiping anyway, but there's no need to add fuel. Especially if there's no _fire_ —reverting to topic, he says, "I thought you said you were together! I thought—Parker, I'm so sorry!"

Pulling herself together, Parker says, "What? Why?"

"I never would've gotten with Eliot if I knew you two weren't going to be a thing, you've had enough trouble without me having someone else and you only having me, it wouldn't be fair—"

Parker and Eliot look at each other, and then Parker comes over to put her arms around Hardison. She's sticky with sweat, like Eliot is. "We are a thing," she tells him. "We're just not a sex thing."

"Parker," Eliot says.

"Parker," Hardison says. "Wait, what?"

"Sorry," Parker says. "There aren't any good words for it. Really not, it's not just that I don't know them. I asked Sophie and everything."

"Hold up," Eliot says, "you asked Sophie?"

Parker shrugs at him, and he shrugs back.

Hardison, still having trouble with the sentence _we're just not a sex thing_ , sits down unsteadily on a stool.

"Sophie says there are some people who don't have sex with anyone," Parker volunteers. "Like, deliberately."

"But we do," Hardison says, and then glances at Eliot, because it feels weird to talk about this even though they're having sex too. "I mean, you have sex with me. Do you not want to? We could stop."

"No," Parker says, "I like it. It's fun. What Eliot and I have, it's just—different."

"Different. Right. And you're okay with this?"

"I have sex with plenty of people," Eliot says, which makes a remarkable amount of sense. "Mostly you these days." Although he's picked up girls in the brewpub since he and Hardison started having sex. It was one of the things that confused Hardison so much about not being able to catch Eliot and Parker getting it on. "I don't need to be having sex with everybody."

Parker nods.

Resting his head in his hands, Hardison says, "I always thought you and Parker were just waiting for me to figure it out before you two could, you know, do it."

Eliot and Parker share another look. Then they make the exact same expression, pulling their mouths sideways. It is, frankly, a little creepy.

Parker says, "You and me took a while to get where we were going. You and Eliot took a little longer. But me and Eliot, it happened almost right away and it's been the same ever since."

"Not exactly the same," Eliot says.

Parker shrugs, accepting the correction. She hugs Hardison again, head turned to look at Eliot. Hardison, watching her watch him, thinks maybe he gets it.

When he notices that Eliot's not looking back at Parker—he's looking at Hardison instead—the knowledge of it settles behind his breastbone. It feels right somehow, for all that it still makes his head spin to think about it, for all that he knows he'll never quite understand what Eliot and Parker have between them.

"Okay," he says.

Parker smiles. "Okay?"

"Better than okay, in fact," Hardison says, and puts his chin on top of Parker's head so he can look right back at Eliot. "Perfect."


End file.
